(Names have been changed to avoid embarrassment.)
As we sat down to dinner last night, Joe said that his belly had been upset since lunch. I asked what he had eaten for lunch. He said, "Chili and Tabasco sauce." Are you kidding me? Why? WHY?!!!
Note to the curious: a combination of chili and Tabasco sauce gives a person a bellyache. It's almost inevitable. Especially if said person is closer to 40- than 20-years-old.
I wasn't home at lunch, but I heard stories. Joe Jr. had asked Joe to get him a drink since Joe Jr. had his hands covered with food. Why were his hands covered with food? Because he doesn't like pizza toppings. So he removed them in such a way that both hands were covered with pizza sauce. I am pretty sure Joe Jr. is old enough to know that such "table manners" are unacceptable.
Joe thought he'd be a goofball (and prove a point) by sticking his hands in his own chili so he wouldn't have to get the drink. "Look at this!" he planned to say. "Do you still want me to get your drink?" Unfortunately, the chili was fresh off the stove and, as it turns out, fresh chili is HOT and can BURN! So, instead of following the plan, he instinctively said, "AAAAAAAH!!" and rushed for the water.
I can't really explain why adventures like this rarely happen when I am home. This may be the last time I dare stay after church for a meeting.
Monday, January 30, 2012
It's cuter if you can hear her little voice
Here are a couple of conversations I've had with Beth recently. Are you ready? (First, a little background. We have reason to believe that Chris' grandmother was part Cherokee.)
Beth: Mom, if I'm an Indian, where is my feather?
Me: I don't know. Where do you think it is?
Beth: I guess this Indian doesn't have a feather.
Beth: Mom, do you know what is sad? When we live with Jesus again, we won't get to watch t.v.
Me: I don't think we'll miss it too much. There will be better things to do.
Beth: I'm going to pack my Hello Kitty backpack with all of my favorite things.
Me: To take with you when you die?
Beth: Yes. But I will miss my pillow.
She has an endearing sense of logic. It really is cuter when you hear her little voice. Trust me.
Beth: Mom, if I'm an Indian, where is my feather?
Me: I don't know. Where do you think it is?
Beth: I guess this Indian doesn't have a feather.
Beth: Mom, do you know what is sad? When we live with Jesus again, we won't get to watch t.v.
Me: I don't think we'll miss it too much. There will be better things to do.
Beth: I'm going to pack my Hello Kitty backpack with all of my favorite things.
Me: To take with you when you die?
Beth: Yes. But I will miss my pillow.
She has an endearing sense of logic. It really is cuter when you hear her little voice. Trust me.
Thursday, January 26, 2012
The Marvels of Megan's Mind
I read an article about Newt's brilliant plan to colonize the moon. (It could be the 51st state!) I was talking to my kids about how it doesn't seem like it would be that pleasant of a place to live--you know, because of the lack of oxygen and stuff. Also, how could we grow vegetables?
Nathan said, "WHAT?! No vegetables? That means NO GARLIC! And no garlic means NO PIZZA!"
Beth looked up and said, "Cheese! We could just pack some cheese!" We better make sure to pack crackers with that cheese.
Beth's response made me think of Wallace and Gromit. And that led me to remember a recent chat with my sister. She said she was feeling peckish and wanted to eat the Wensleydale cheese in her fridge. Then she added that she couldn't say the word Wensleydale without imagining herself with a British accent...and made of claymation. And then we decided that Nick Park was the best thing to come out of England since the Magna Carta. Or possibly since the Beatles.
I think a valid argument could be made for the Magna Carta. On the other hand, "I Want To Hold Your Hand" has had a significant impact on the world.
And while we're on the subject, I vote for Puerto Rico over the moon. You know, if we want a 51st state. Thinking of Puerto Rico reminds me of one of my best friends from BYU. We used to listen to Puerto Rican music when we would hang out. The only rap I've listened to consistently is in Spanish.
I don't speak Spanish. It would be a useful language to know. But I chose to study Welsh. That's certainly come in handy. Dw i'n byw yn Dinas Llyn Halen. See? That means I live in Salt Lake City.
I typed that sentence in then thought I'd better check my spelling. So I typed the same sentence into a Welsh to English online translator. It came back saying something about I heartburn live in crooked City Salt Lake. Which means one of two things: online translators leave a little to be desired or I spelled something wrong. So, I looked it up. For unknown reasons I keep a Welsh language guide on my headboard/bookshelf.
You would think I would have learned my lesson and decided to help my kids learn a useful language, like Spanish. But I think it's more meaningful if they learn Hawaiian. I've had difficulty finding a good Hawaiian language tutorial. But I just found a place very near my house that teaches Hawaiian language classes! As well as Hawaiian culture and dance. And they have parties!
You may be wondering how I found that place. Last summer, Sarah's halau (that means place to learn hula) suddenly closed. They needed to find a new studio. For weeks, we called her teacher every week to find out if they were dancing that night or not. The owner of the halau told us he would let us know when they started up again. So we have been waiting. We're tired of waiting. I emailed the teacher, Aunty Kaui, to ask her advice. She told me to try out the Hawaiian Cultural Center, which is very near where I live. That is where I found a place not only to dance but to learn a language! So, one of these days, we'll get started. I'm shy. I don't like to try new things.
Speaking of the halau closing on us reminds me of something else. Last summer, the kids' piano teacher had to let us go, the dance studio closed on us, and my yoga teacher got sick and quit. The kids were also taking a yoga class from her. We went from a busy life to having nothing to do. I started to get a complex since we didn't quit anything, they quit us. (Just kidding, piano teacher who is reading this.)
I would teach the kids the piano myself, but our piano is in storage. We have a keyboard here, but I find it difficult to use. I hate it.
Do you want to know my piano story? One year for Christmas, Chris and I agreed to spend $25 on each others' presents. I bought him a vegetable chopper thing. He bought me a piano. I felt a little foolish. His vegetable chopper wasn't even electric. Turns out, he had bought the piano months before for only $100! It was quite run-down, but had a good soundboard. He refinished it himself. It was a gift of love. And I got to pick the color! I chose a dark brown (Chris would have chosen a lighter color) and I chose a dull finish. I don't like a shiny piano. I don't like shiny things.
Which is probably why I was glad that Chris gave me an engagement ring made of handcarved wood instead of some shiny metal thing. It was beautiful.
This blentry brings to mind "stream of consciousness" which reminds me of a thread of hilarious comments we had once on a Facebook group. The thread was called "Jacob's stream of consciousness." Thinking about that reminds me of Tom Swifty.
I would include an example of a Tom Swifty here, but I never was very good at them. And so, with that, my thinking is finished.
Nathan said, "WHAT?! No vegetables? That means NO GARLIC! And no garlic means NO PIZZA!"
Beth looked up and said, "Cheese! We could just pack some cheese!" We better make sure to pack crackers with that cheese.
Beth's response made me think of Wallace and Gromit. And that led me to remember a recent chat with my sister. She said she was feeling peckish and wanted to eat the Wensleydale cheese in her fridge. Then she added that she couldn't say the word Wensleydale without imagining herself with a British accent...and made of claymation. And then we decided that Nick Park was the best thing to come out of England since the Magna Carta. Or possibly since the Beatles.
I think a valid argument could be made for the Magna Carta. On the other hand, "I Want To Hold Your Hand" has had a significant impact on the world.
And while we're on the subject, I vote for Puerto Rico over the moon. You know, if we want a 51st state. Thinking of Puerto Rico reminds me of one of my best friends from BYU. We used to listen to Puerto Rican music when we would hang out. The only rap I've listened to consistently is in Spanish.
I don't speak Spanish. It would be a useful language to know. But I chose to study Welsh. That's certainly come in handy. Dw i'n byw yn Dinas Llyn Halen. See? That means I live in Salt Lake City.
I typed that sentence in then thought I'd better check my spelling. So I typed the same sentence into a Welsh to English online translator. It came back saying something about I heartburn live in crooked City Salt Lake. Which means one of two things: online translators leave a little to be desired or I spelled something wrong. So, I looked it up. For unknown reasons I keep a Welsh language guide on my headboard/bookshelf.
You would think I would have learned my lesson and decided to help my kids learn a useful language, like Spanish. But I think it's more meaningful if they learn Hawaiian. I've had difficulty finding a good Hawaiian language tutorial. But I just found a place very near my house that teaches Hawaiian language classes! As well as Hawaiian culture and dance. And they have parties!
You may be wondering how I found that place. Last summer, Sarah's halau (that means place to learn hula) suddenly closed. They needed to find a new studio. For weeks, we called her teacher every week to find out if they were dancing that night or not. The owner of the halau told us he would let us know when they started up again. So we have been waiting. We're tired of waiting. I emailed the teacher, Aunty Kaui, to ask her advice. She told me to try out the Hawaiian Cultural Center, which is very near where I live. That is where I found a place not only to dance but to learn a language! So, one of these days, we'll get started. I'm shy. I don't like to try new things.
Speaking of the halau closing on us reminds me of something else. Last summer, the kids' piano teacher had to let us go, the dance studio closed on us, and my yoga teacher got sick and quit. The kids were also taking a yoga class from her. We went from a busy life to having nothing to do. I started to get a complex since we didn't quit anything, they quit us. (Just kidding, piano teacher who is reading this.)
I would teach the kids the piano myself, but our piano is in storage. We have a keyboard here, but I find it difficult to use. I hate it.
Do you want to know my piano story? One year for Christmas, Chris and I agreed to spend $25 on each others' presents. I bought him a vegetable chopper thing. He bought me a piano. I felt a little foolish. His vegetable chopper wasn't even electric. Turns out, he had bought the piano months before for only $100! It was quite run-down, but had a good soundboard. He refinished it himself. It was a gift of love. And I got to pick the color! I chose a dark brown (Chris would have chosen a lighter color) and I chose a dull finish. I don't like a shiny piano. I don't like shiny things.
Which is probably why I was glad that Chris gave me an engagement ring made of handcarved wood instead of some shiny metal thing. It was beautiful.
This blentry brings to mind "stream of consciousness" which reminds me of a thread of hilarious comments we had once on a Facebook group. The thread was called "Jacob's stream of consciousness." Thinking about that reminds me of Tom Swifty.
I would include an example of a Tom Swifty here, but I never was very good at them. And so, with that, my thinking is finished.
Monday, January 23, 2012
School stories
Can you stand another story from school? Beth was working on her math. She loves math. The instructions said to write a number. She chose 5. It's her favorite number. That's because she's 5-years-old. Her favorite number changes annually. Then she was supposed to choose another number. She would color the graph to represent each number and circle the smaller number. Got it?
She wrote the second number in pictures: a potted plant and a heart. She said the plant is 1 and the heart is 2. 1 and 2 is twelve. I said it was very good and clever and what not, but the graph only has room for you to go up to 9, so choose a number between 0 and 9. She thought and thought. I suggested she write a "real number" instead of a number picture. She told me that she prefers to write in her secret numbers. It's a code. She drew a picture, pointed at it, and said, "Baby Jesus is the number 9." And then she colored 9 squares on the graph.
Perfect. A+
She wrote the second number in pictures: a potted plant and a heart. She said the plant is 1 and the heart is 2. 1 and 2 is twelve. I said it was very good and clever and what not, but the graph only has room for you to go up to 9, so choose a number between 0 and 9. She thought and thought. I suggested she write a "real number" instead of a number picture. She told me that she prefers to write in her secret numbers. It's a code. She drew a picture, pointed at it, and said, "Baby Jesus is the number 9." And then she colored 9 squares on the graph.
Perfect. A+
Friday, January 20, 2012
School curriculum
I asked the kids to make lists of the subjects they'd like to study in school. I want to make sure we're meeting their interests. I enjoyed their lists. I've decided that #1 subject to study is spelling. I will correct their spelling when I duplicate their lists below.
Ammon
1. science
2. technology
3. physics
4. astronomy
5. mythology
6. psychology
7. art
8. poetry
9. human anatomy
10. biology
11. legends
Sarah
1. science
2. math and stuff
3. physics
4. art
5. poetry
6. astronomy
7. technology
Nathan
1. science
2. math
3. history
Beth listed hers through pictures.
1. this person is watching tv
2. this person is doing yoga
3. this person is doing yoga, too
4. this person is looking at the blue, blue sky
5. She drew a group of people. One was speaking via a word bubble. Ammon had written the words for her. "I just wanna sit around doin' nothing."
I think we'll do a little of all of that.
Ammon
1. science
2. technology
3. physics
4. astronomy
5. mythology
6. psychology
7. art
8. poetry
9. human anatomy
10. biology
11. legends
Sarah
1. science
2. math and stuff
3. physics
4. art
5. poetry
6. astronomy
7. technology
Nathan
1. science
2. math
3. history
Beth listed hers through pictures.
1. this person is watching tv
2. this person is doing yoga
3. this person is doing yoga, too
4. this person is looking at the blue, blue sky
5. She drew a group of people. One was speaking via a word bubble. Ammon had written the words for her. "I just wanna sit around doin' nothing."
I think we'll do a little of all of that.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Namaste
Beth is so much fun. The other day, I tried to have a little at-home date with each of my children. We read together, played games together, or whatever they thought of together. Beth decided we should do yoga together. Just wait, it gets better. She was my teacher. And what a delightful teacher she was. We hopped across the room like frogs and flapped our arms as if they were butterfly wings. It was a wonderful workout.
I was reminded of Beth's birthday party. When she turned 5, she wanted a friend party. She, along with her 9-year-old sister, Sarah, planned all the party games. I didn't even find out what they had planned until they announced it to the party-goers. They did a really good job planning and preparing. One of the games was "See Who Can Stand On One Leg the Longest." It was entertaining to watch. Some of the kids balanced by holding on to nearby furniture. Some wobbled and toppled and tried again. And then there was Beth. She stood in a perfect tree position. One leg perched on the other and her arms held gracefully in the air. She stood in perfect balance looking at her little friends with a confused expression. Why were they so wobbly? It was pretty cute to see.
I was reminded of Beth's birthday party. When she turned 5, she wanted a friend party. She, along with her 9-year-old sister, Sarah, planned all the party games. I didn't even find out what they had planned until they announced it to the party-goers. They did a really good job planning and preparing. One of the games was "See Who Can Stand On One Leg the Longest." It was entertaining to watch. Some of the kids balanced by holding on to nearby furniture. Some wobbled and toppled and tried again. And then there was Beth. She stood in a perfect tree position. One leg perched on the other and her arms held gracefully in the air. She stood in perfect balance looking at her little friends with a confused expression. Why were they so wobbly? It was pretty cute to see.
Friday, January 6, 2012
400
First of all, this is my 400th post. I will make myself a cake to celebrate this major milestone.
And now, I will tell you about a real milestone.
There are times my kids achieve wonderful things as a result of work, desire, and natural talent. This week, my daughter achieved something as a result of work and desire but not so much because of natural talent. It is something that doesn't come naturally or easily to her. She has worked very, very hard to make this happen. She read her first chapter book all by herself. We have read many books together aloud. This week, she decided to read a book she got for Christmas. She set a goal to read it in two days. She stayed up past her bedtime to achieve this goal. And she did it. Hurray!
Earlier this week, I read an article in a parenting magazine about how to recognize dyslexia in your toddler or preschooler. Every sign given in the article aligned with my daughter's struggles. I don't think her dyslexia is severe, but it has presented some challenges. When I have asked "experts" about her reading, they have told me they think she is lazy and impatient. They have told me that her struggles are my fault for not teaching her right. I am relieved to have read the article and know what I have suspected for years. My older sister has a child who works through dyslexia and I have learned teaching techniques from her that I have used to help my daughter be successful. This week's achievement marks a major milestone in her progress. We will continue to help her as best we can. The natural talent she has that will be the most beneficial to her is her amazing determination. This girl can do anything because she is willing to put in the work to make it so!
And now, I will tell you about a real milestone.
There are times my kids achieve wonderful things as a result of work, desire, and natural talent. This week, my daughter achieved something as a result of work and desire but not so much because of natural talent. It is something that doesn't come naturally or easily to her. She has worked very, very hard to make this happen. She read her first chapter book all by herself. We have read many books together aloud. This week, she decided to read a book she got for Christmas. She set a goal to read it in two days. She stayed up past her bedtime to achieve this goal. And she did it. Hurray!
Earlier this week, I read an article in a parenting magazine about how to recognize dyslexia in your toddler or preschooler. Every sign given in the article aligned with my daughter's struggles. I don't think her dyslexia is severe, but it has presented some challenges. When I have asked "experts" about her reading, they have told me they think she is lazy and impatient. They have told me that her struggles are my fault for not teaching her right. I am relieved to have read the article and know what I have suspected for years. My older sister has a child who works through dyslexia and I have learned teaching techniques from her that I have used to help my daughter be successful. This week's achievement marks a major milestone in her progress. We will continue to help her as best we can. The natural talent she has that will be the most beneficial to her is her amazing determination. This girl can do anything because she is willing to put in the work to make it so!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Geography Lesson
We have been studying the 50 states during the geography portion of our school day. All of the kids can name all 50 states (thank you, Ray Charles) and they can place most of the states on a map.
Today, Beth (who is in her preschool year) looked at my t-shirt and said, "What does H-I stand for?" I said it stood for Hawaii. She said, "Oh. Hawaii is one of my favorite states." I asked her what her other favorite states were. I expected her to list states where she has cousins or perhaps the one she wrote on her map earlier today. Her response was so much better. "Well, my next favorite state is BYU and then America."
Good enough, Beth. Good enough.
Then she added, "And then Alabama!" Interesting choice.
Today, Beth (who is in her preschool year) looked at my t-shirt and said, "What does H-I stand for?" I said it stood for Hawaii. She said, "Oh. Hawaii is one of my favorite states." I asked her what her other favorite states were. I expected her to list states where she has cousins or perhaps the one she wrote on her map earlier today. Her response was so much better. "Well, my next favorite state is BYU and then America."
Good enough, Beth. Good enough.
Then she added, "And then Alabama!" Interesting choice.
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